Shaikh al-Abaani Advises a Young Guy from America who Wanted Advice on Being Gay
Questioner: Another problem, one of the brothers, O Shaikh, I got a message of his yesterday, wallaahi, makes you cry.
Al-Albaani: Allaahul-Mustaʿaan.
Questioner: Can I read it to you? It’s short, yaʿnī …
Al-Albaani: Tafaḍḍal.
Questioner: “I have a problem and I don’t know if there is a solution to it, especially since I’ve tried and failed. Before I mention it I want to let you know that I don’t want to identify myself I’ll just go by the name ‘ʿAbdullah.’
I have a big problem which is ruining my life. I’m in the prime of my youth and unfortunately I suffer from the sickness of homosexuality. I have no sexual desire for the opposite sex, my sexual inclination is for those of my own sex, other guys. It started in puberty and, truth be told, I ignored it because I thought that it would pass with time and I didn’t appreciate how dangerous this issue was until after I was twenty years old when I started to try and find out if there was a medical cure for it but they said that this sickness will stay with you for as long as you live.”
Al-Albaani: Auʾūthubillah.
Questioner: “And things have gotten worse especially since now I’m at the age to get married and my family are insisting on getting me married and I just try to divert the topic every time they bring it up because I don’t want to oppress [any future spouse]. I can’t tell my family about it, I haven’t told a soul about this. I have opened my heart up to you hoping that you can help me, with Allaah’s Permission.”
So by Allaah, yaʿnī, mushkilah, O Shaikh, I started to write a letter to him and I haven’t finished it yet, I wanted to say in it that the person who told you that it is a life long disease is a devil.
Al-Albaani: Of course, you are correct in saying that.
Questioner: Naturally I wanted to remind him of some aayahs, like, “Say, ˹O Prophet, that Allah says,˺ “O My servants who have exceeded the limits against their souls! Do not lose hope in Allah’s mercy, for Allah certainly forgives all sins. He is indeed the All-Forgiving, Most Merciful,” [39:53] and, “Indeed, when Satan whispers to those mindful ˹of Allah˺, they remember ˹their Lord˺ then they start to see ˹things˺ clearly.” [7:201] Then I will mention the ḥadīth about that Companion who said that, “A bad thought will come to me where it is easier on me to fall out of the sky and have birds snatch me away …”
Al-Abaani: Okay.
Questioner: I’m [summarising all this here but] will mention it in full, insha Allaah.
Al-Albaani: Good, good.
Questioner: It’s from the devil, unless you have another suggestion, O Shaikh.
Al-Albaani: You must remind him of the ḥadīths which curse the person who does that, if he is a believer.
Questioner: Yes I have included that.
Al-Albaani: Ok good. If he doesn’t care and doesn’t establish his prayers, then in such a case there really is no cure.
Questioner: It doesn’t seem to me that he is wanton because his question alone doesn’t show that he is, O Shaikh.
Al-Albaani: That is how it seems and as such you should give him the narrations which strike fear [into the soul] and which warn [against such actions].
Questioner: Yes.
Al-Albaani: Because in addition to what you mentioned earlier these narrations will, inshaa Allaah, be a cure for him. And tell him to also make sure to say the adhkār and the supplications that have been reported for all occasions, like when leaving the house, when coming into it—all of these are legislated means and are regarded as spiritual cures for all diseases of the soul. And if you could give him a copy of Ṣaḥīḥ al-Kalim aṭ-Ṭayyib if you have one.
Questioner: Yes I have a copy, inshaa Allaah.
Al-Albaani: He needs to take care in memorising these adhkār and that he makes sure to say them in every situation and in that way, inshaa Allaah, the cure will happen.
Questioner: How authentic is the ḥadīth that the Throne of ar-Raḥmān shakes at …
Al-Albaani: It’s not authentic.
Questioner: It’s not authentic?
Al-Albaani: No.
Questioner: [Any other] ḥadīth which strike fear into one?
Al-Albaani: Maybe you can refer to my book [about marriage], Ādāb az-Zafāf [available in English under the title ‘The Etiquettes of Marriage and Weddings’].
Questioner: The one who does it and the one it is done to …
Al-Albaani: Yes my book Ādāb az-Zafāf has a good amount of ḥadīths about that.
Questioner: [Never heard the Shaikh properly:] Where can I find them?
Al-Albaani: I said Ādāb az-Zafāf.
Questioner: Ādāb az-Zafāf.
Al-Albaani: My book Ādāb az-Zafāf you must have a copy?
Questioner: Yes I do, yes.
Al-Albaani: Do you have the al-Maktabah al-Islāmiyyah one, not the al-Maktab al-Islāmī one?
Questioner: I got a copy from Kuwait two years ago and you said that we shouldn’t rely on the other copy.
Al-Albaani: Yes.
Questioner: I have the al-Maktabah al-Islāmiyyah print.
Al-Albaani: That’s the one.
Questioner: This is the latest one?
Al-Albaani: Yes it is. Inshaa Allaah go back to that and take some of the ḥadīth from there on this topic …
Fatwās from the Car and on the Phone, no. 268.
The Albaani Site 